I have been 40-year-old since this May.
Confucius, a philosopher in ancient China, said that he had no more been puzzled since 40. After him, 40-year-old is named as "Fuwaku" [not being puzzled] in Japan.
However, I am always puzzling deciding my way now. Being straight and free from bewilderment is so difficult. Taking responsibility to things around me is stressful, too. I feel even I am yet a child.
What distinguish adults from children?
There are many answers written by many people. In my opinion, there are three conditions to be met as being an adult:
1. Being patient to conflicts
For children, they are kings and queens in the world. The parents always protect them. The society is tolerant of their rude behavior. Youth means recklessness.
One of the challenges in an adolescent is to know there are many opinions different from yours.
The crush of thoughts causes serious conflict. Many youths make an argument about politics, life, and other many silly matters. Compromising the reality is a humiliation for them. As a result, they sometimes lose friends by the conflict. Later, they learn to choose proper colleagues who are on their side.
The matter is, accepting the fact that you often cannot accept others.
Everyone has a different opinion. No one is right or wrong, good or evil. This fact is quite straightforward, but a little hard to recognize.
Actually, I did not agree with it when 20. I hoped everyone to agree with me, otherwise I agree with them. It took some years for me to notice that it was neither possible nor desirable.
Respecting other begin with accepting the difference. The justice you believe in is no more one for others.
2. Providing something to others
Generally speaking, adult people are responsible to earn money to feed themselves. Dependence on others represents immaturity.
However, the recent situation is changing. The job rate is decreasing. Working style is extremely varied. Not working means no more being irresponsible.
Nevertheless, I think that, some kind of creativity is necessary for adults. Consuming everything and producing nothing is not cool as an adult.
For example, some people love computer games. They are indulged in playing. If you are one, I recommend you to make some output about it; e.g. writing a playing diary, or telling other players valuable information about the game. Even if merely in the game, I think such activity is nonetheless productive.
3. Having a secret
The last thing is a little pessimistic. After all, every human is alone. Your thought cannot be understood by everyone. Sometimes you make a confession of your negative emotion, such as solitude, cursing others, and so on. Wait a while, there is nobody to sympathize you.
On the contrary, perhaps you make hidden efforts for someone's happiness. You may wish others to admire your endeavor. But if you tell the thing, your virtue will lose the brightness.
I think adults have their own secret whom you should bring to the grave. Even if no one would admire your covert contribution to the world, you should believe in yourself. It is the condition of an adult.