What is communication skills?

Some people feel difficult to communicate with others.

Some of them are diagnosed as a developmental disorder because a lack of proper communication is a dominant feature of this category of disease. Of course, not all people with communication difficulty have autism.

Communication skills are hardly definable. There are several styles of communication. Some people take leadership in every situation. Others are good at listening to others.

Among them, communication skills are often recognized as the ability to report one's thought to others as well as understanding other's thought. Also, communication is sometimes identified as the skill of making a consensus.

 At least in Japan, however, I am against this idea.

Many Japanese are not good at discussing one thing in detail. A debate is one of the most difficult skills for Japanese. Not a few Japanese feel unhappy when entering a discussion. Rejecting a proposal is sometimes misunderstood as denying the presenter himself.

Thus, communication is not a negotiation in Japan.

Instead, communication skill means an ability to maintain relationships with persons who are not supportive of you. Japanese deemed with good communication skills look friendly and calm. But they are not always empathetic with your thought. Simply they make smile not to make you angry.

In my sense, some patients with developmental disorder misunderstand this fact. They tend to think knowing others deeply is necessary to make good communication. Such attitudes are often annoyed by Japanese people. As a result, they are rejected, which makes them isolated more.

I recommend you to make a smile with no particular intention if you would like to get along with Japanese. There is little need for understanding others to make a continuous relationship with them.